Fascist Cringe: A Theory

Why Pete Hegseth’s performance of shamelessly toxic masculinity rings so hollow

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It was a performance of toxic masculinity so shameless that I blush to even recount it. During his forty-five minute speech to 800 of the highest-ranking military officials in the country—many of whom had to fly in from far-flung destinations across the globe for the occasion—Secretary of Defense War Pete Hegseth appeared peppy, brittle, and drunk on his own rhetoric. His message? America’s armed forces are so great that they are totally unrivalled and capable of crushing any enemy like the lowliest of dung-beetles. And yet they are totally inadequate to the task that awaits them, Hegseth informed them. “Should our enemies choose foolishly to challenge us, they will be crushed by the violence, precision and ferocity of the War Department. In other words, to our enemies, FAFO. If necessary, our troops can translate that for you.” (There was an awkward tiny titter.)

“Either we’re ready to win or we are not,” Hegseth continued, invoking the law of excluded middle (P or NOT P) to no avail, given that he was about to violate the law of non-contradiction (P and NOT P logically implies absurdity). “You see, this urgent moment, of course, requires more troops, more munitions, more drones, more patriots, more submarines, more B-21 bombers! It requires more innovation, more AI in everything and ahead of the curve [sic]! More cyber effects, more counter-UAS, more space, more speed! America is the strongest, but we need to get stronger and quickly. The time is now and the cause is urgent.” ROWR! The generals looked on, bleakly.

Image credit: NYT

Afterward, their reactions were described as “disbelief” by one journalist, along with being frustrated and disturbed at having been flown in for the meeting in deference to Hegseth’s ego. “I have yet to find a single military official who was in the audience today who thought that this was a good presentation,” The New York Times Pentagon correspondent Helene Cooper told MSNBC on Tuesday. (Trump’s ensuing speech went down like a similarly lead balloon with the audience.) And I have a theory about why it rang so hollow.